Once and Future
by ai-08
Summary: After the defeat of Thanos, Peter returns. For Tony it has been nine agonizing months. For Peter, it has been eight years. (Tony/Peter) Infinity Wars Fix-It
1. Chapter 1

**Part One**

One by one, everyone is starting to reappear after the defeat of Thanos. Everyone except Peter. Tony thinks the universe has some sick sense of humor to bring everyone back save the one person he would throw it all away for, but he's come to expect this to be his lot in life. Tony has it all. Except-

He tosses the rest of his drink back and stares at the news broadcast. Tearful, joyful reunions are playing, intersected with clips of interviews and praise for the Avengers, even those who, until a week ago, had been considered a possible threat.

Commercials play and the next program begins; it's a special on Rogers and Barnes. Tony throws his tumbler across the room and the glass and ice scatter across the floor.

His second visit to May goes much better than his first; she doesn't immediately slam the door in his face this time. Instead, she stares him in the eye for what feels like ages and Tony is rooted in the spot, frozen with the fear and guilt that is constantly swelling in his mind and his gut like a restless sea.

Usually he would have drowned it out with liquor by now. Not that it ever really works.

May finally steps aside and he follows her into the kitchen. They sit at the table. She doesn't offer any refreshments.

"What do you want, Mr. Stark?" she asks.

Tony doesn't know how to answer that question. He knows he shouldn't even be here, that he is the last person May wants to see. But he feels compelled to be here, to be near someone who is close to Peter. But now that he is here, it's too much. For the both of them. May wraps her arms around herself and stares off into the distance. Tony keeps his eyes on the table, studying the wood grain.

The weight of it all is intolerable and he's got to say something, anything. He's got to apologize, promise he'll bring him back. Promise he won't fuck up like this ever again but her phone rings and she excuses herself.

He can hear her crying and gets up to leave when a certain door catches his eye. He walks over and pushes it open.

Peter's room looks just as it had on the day he'd roped the young man, the child, into his problems. With one new addition- on his desk sits a framed photograph of the two of them. It had been taken on the way home from Germany. Peter's smile is wide and vibrant while Tony looks mildly amused, but distant.

He barely makes it down to his vehicle before the panic attack begins.

"We need to talk."

"You need to get out of my workshop."

"Tony. Please."

Tony doesn't turn from his work table, ignoring Steve and hoping he'll take the hint. The Avengers may officially have made up and reunited, but he doesn't give a shit.

"Can we please talk?" Steve tries again, voice soft and full of pain.

Tony tosses a tool to the table but doesn't turn around.

"How long are you going to keep shutting me out?"

"I know you don't understand big words, Cap," Tony finally responds, voice dripping with spite, "so unless you've suddenly become an expert in anything other than your own fucking agenda, I suggest you get out."

Steve is quiet for a moment. Then, "You can't keep this up," he nearly whispers. "You've got to eat. You've got to get out of this room and rest. Bruce-"

"I've heard it all. He doesn't understand. None of you do. I'll figure it out myself. Stephen saw-"

"Stephen saw a possible, not a definitive future," Steve snaps. "You think running yourself into the ground is the answer? You think this is how you'll bring him back?"

"I don't abandon my friends," Tony snarls.

"Taking care of yourself doesn't mean you're abandoning him. How do you expect to accomplish anything if you don't look after yourself, Tony?"

Tony laughs, hollow and dark. "I think we're done here, Rogers. Get the hell out."

"You look like shit," Stephen says, taking a sip from his teacup.

Tony isn't surprised. He's been holed up in his workshop for weeks. He can feel how close he is to a solution, but he keeps hitting dead end after dead end, almost making a break through only to find that he's right back to where he started.

"I'm close," Tony mutters, rubbing at his tired eyes.

"You smell," Stephen corrects. "Get up." Before he can argue, they're in Tony's private quarters. Stephen takes a seat by the window and takes another sip of his tea.

"Make yourself presentable. I've got information."

"What-"

"I'm absolutely certain I would be able to smell you from the astral plane. For God's sake, man. Go take a shower."

"I need-"

"Peter needs you at your best," Stephen says firmly. "Now take a shower. And shave. You look like a sad, dirty yeti."

"It's more varied than we originally thought," Tony mutters, reading through the files Stephen has brought him. It's information on several of the people who had been brought back from the Soul Stone. He already knew from the Avengers who had been taken and brought back that everyone experienced something different- the reports from the Avengers all stated that some had felt as if they had only been gone a few hours while others claimed a few days. Then others, such as T'Challa, claimed to have hardly noticed any time pass at all. And these new reports, gathered from all over the world, showed that some people had felt weeks pass and in rare cases even years. And physical examinations were backing it up.

Tony starts to pace and has FRIDAY running all sorts of algorithms, trying to make sense of this new information.

"People are still appearing, Tony," Stephen adds. "Just yesterday, a man from Sussex finally came back. Said he'd only been gone an hour."

Tony nods, but he's only half listening.

"He's going to come back," Stephen says after a few minutes have passed.

"I know," Tony says, not looking away from his work. "I'm going to bring him back."

Another month passes. Six more people return in that time but none of them are Peter.

Tony keeps working and regularly sends out Iron Men to search the world over and downs a bottle of whiskey.


	2. Chapter 2

One. Two. Three cubes in his glass.

Tony pours well past two fingers and some of the amber liquid runs down the side. He takes a long sip, then another, glancing around his workshop. He's been welding, tinkering with scraps. Blasting Metallica loudly.

One. Two. Three more cubes.

Anything to fill this nothingness that has moved in and occupied every corner of his mind.

"So, we're still being maudlin, I take it. Excellent." It's Stephen.

Tony takes another sip, but his tumbler has suddenly become a tea cup.

"Don't do that," Tony tries to snap, but his words are slurred.

"Snap out of it, Stark. We've got shit to do."

Tony ignores him.

"Tony, I know you-"

"They're planning a memorial service," Tony finally speaks. His voice is raw. "I've been-" he stops and laughs, almost hysterical. It breaks into a sob. "They asked me to speak." His voice cracks. "Fuck. _Fuck_."

It's been close to seven months since the defeat of Thanos. Very few people are still missing, but many others had lost their lives that day due to the suddenly unmanned vehicles, air crafts, and equipment. They deserve to be remembered.

Tony thinks about the young man who passed when the doctor operating on him disappeared. He thinks about the incident outside a school in Queens when a cross guard had vanished. He thinks about the subway crash at Seventh Ave; there had been no survivors.

He thinks about- He never _stops_ thinking about Peter, growing cold and brittle, crumbling in his arms into nothing.

"Why isn't he back yet?" Tony says, staring off. "What am I doing wrong?"

"Where was it like for you?" Tony asks.

"What was what like?" Stephen asks, flipping through Tony's vinyl's. "I'm keeping this," he says as he pulls out a _Queen_ record.

"When you disappeared. Your file… You only said that you were gone for a day but it didn't go into detail. What happened?"

"Oh." Stephen takes a deep breath and gives a small, self-depreciating smile. "It was perfect," he says quietly, voice low and thick.

"Perfect how?" Tony says, on edge.

"I woke up and I was a neurosurgeon. And Christine was my wife. I knew right away that it was an illusion."

"What did you do when you figured it out?"

"I performed an operation. Patient had advanced brain stem glioma." He looks down at his hands; they still tremble. "And then I went home and made love to my wife." He pauses again, taking a shaky breath. "And then I came back to reality."

Tony pulls himself out from under his latest project. He's greasy and hasn't slept in days, but for the first time in a while, he's full of energy. He walks around his creation, running a hand over the metal. He steps back and smiles.

He's been sober for a week, now. (He had to be to make sure everything was perfect. Tony doesn't take risks when it comes this sort of thing.)

"Let's take you out for a test drive, baby," he croons.

When the vehicle makes a smooth transition from road to twelve stories up the side of a building, he can't help but grin. Peter is going to love his Spider-Mobile.

"Happy Birthday, kid," he whispers to the night air.

Peter's seventeenth birthday comes and goes. Tony wants to visit May again, but he thinks better of it and opts to open a bank account for her instead. He deposits enough money for rent, clothing, Peter's college tuition. Whatever they might need. There isn't a single withdrawal, but Tony keeps it open all the same.

The Avengers have started to become a more cohesive unit, but Tony has chosen to remain distant from Rogers. At this point, he knows it's got more to do with jealousy than any sense of betrayal he once felt. But he doesn't want to think about that. Tony hasn't touched a drink in weeks and he's going to keep it that way.

He doesn't have time to dwell on Rogers and how everything seems to be working out for him. He's found his drive again and he's going to focus all his time and energy into a renewed search for Peter.

It has now been nine months since the defeat of Thanos.

Tony is sipping at his coffee, reading some news, when Stephen practically leaps through his portal, levitating in the middle of his kitchen.

"Jesus _Christ_ , man. How many times do I have to tell you, don't _do_ that."

"For God's sake, Tony. Put some pants on," Stephen says, ignoring the other man's complaint. "I know how to find Peter."

The coffee mug slips from Tony's hand and crashes on the tiled floor.

Stephen just stares at him.

"Are you going to faint, too, or can we get going?"

"So you're telling me the reason he hasn't returned is because… He keeps trying to return."

Stephen nods. "The soul stone is essentially a self-contained universe. Every time he tried to leave he created a dimension within a dimension. That's why he never came back. He's essentially stuck right now."

"So how do we get him out?" Tony asks tightly, drumming his fingers on the table. He's trying to stay focused but he's trembling with the need to act. They can talk later; he needs to bring Peter back _now_.

"He tried for so long, he was almost untraceable. Luckily Peter eventually stopped trying to jump dimensions and I was able to find him."

Tony's stomach is in knots. Nine months. Nine fucking months. And they were only able to find Peter because the young man had eventually… given up.

"Let's go," Tony says and suits up. "Talk on the way."

"Hang on, Tony," Stephen says softly, causing Tony to pause before putting up his face plate.

"What?" he snaps.

"Time… Time works differently in the Soul Stone. And Peter is… he's gone so deep. He's been in there for a long time. A _long_ time, Tony."

"What are you saying."

"I'm just saying… be prepared."

Stephen opens the portal. Tony sees himself on the other side. He's younger, wearing a tux, and standing in Avenger's Tower. Tony smiles ruefully for a moment. Standing close to him is a young man he thinks he recognizes, but he can only see a partial profile. Tony tries to peer around Stephen's damned cloak to get a better look.

He doesn't get the chance to, though, because in the next moment the portal is closed and a young man in a dark three piece suit is standing before him.

His hair is cut close and swept to the side. There's a hint of stubble on his jaw, and his hazel eyes are wide in shock.

Without breaking eye contact, Tony claps his hands once. The Iron Man armor begins to recede and Tony reaches forward with a trembling hand.

"Tony?" Peter asks and takes a step back. "What… What's going on?"


	3. Chapter 3

Peter looks around, eyes wide, and Tony can tell he's about two seconds away from jumping up the wall.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Tony says soothingly. "It's me. Tony. You're back. You're safe."

Peter looks at him as if he's looking at him for the first time and it's then that Tony notices the differences. Peter's taller, almost Tony's height now. He's broader in the shoulders, too, and his jaw is more defined. He can see the hint of a beard, too, much fuller than that of a boy on the cusp of adulthood.

"FRIDAY," Tony says, trying to stay calm. "Get Banner. Now."

"How is he?" Tony asks.

"He's… been through a lot, Tony," Bruce replies, trying to choose his words carefully. "Physically he's fine, but…"

"Spit it out," Tony snaps. "Physically he's fine but what?"

"He thinks he's twenty-three," Bruce says, only slightly ruffled. "He thinks he's just graduated from ESU with a degree in biophysics. I can't- I don't know if I can really help him, Tony," he says gently. "His body scan says he's twenty-six, he says he's twenty-three, and he's only been gone for under a year. This- this is beyond me."

"It's the Stone," Stephen says. "The deeper he got, the more time passed. Did he say anything else?"

Bruce shakes his head no. "He's pretty upset. Didn't feel like talking."

"I'm gonna check on him," Tony says and gets up.

"No, you're not," says Stephen.

"I'm not just going to sit here while he's in his room wondering where the fuck-"

"He doesn't want to see you, Tony," Bruce cuts him off.

"What?" He feels like he's been punched in the gut.

"Peter doesn't want to talk to you right now," Bruce says, voice softer now.

The next day Tony sends a driver to pick up May. When she arrives at the compound she's a sobbing hot mess, hugging Tony so tightly and thanking him over and over again.

He points her in the direction of Peter's quarters and quickly excuses himself to his private suite and falls apart all over again.

A few weeks pass and Thor comes to visit. Normally he'd be happy to see the God of Thunder but now…

 _Ugh_.

He pours himself a drink and walks over to the floor to ceiling windows to watch the scene playing out on the lawn below.

Thor is gesturing wildly with his big, stupid, well-toned arms, probably telling some big, stupid story. Peter smiles up at him and Tony can't decide if he wants to hug Thor for bringing a smile to his face or slap him for... Well.

Doesn't Thor have a half-reformed brother to bug and a kingdom to run? Tony's lip curls and he turns away from the sight, stalking down the hall.

Tony sits in his 1932 Flathead Roadster, nursing his third whiskey and idly scrolling through his tablet.

"Oh, Jesus, we're back to this, are we?" Stephen asks.

"Go away."

"Can't wait to! Promise me you won't try to shoot Thor as soon as I leave." He pauses, then adds, "He's got an axe now."

" _'He's got an axe now_ ,'" Tony mocks under his breath.

Stephen rolls his eyes. He feels a headache coming on. "Stark. Thor isn't the enemy. You should be glad Peter has found someone he can talk to."

"Well, pardon the shit out of me," Tony says bitterly. "I used to be that person."

"That was a long time ago for Peter," Stephen reminds him gently.

Tony tosses the tablet onto the hood of the car without any care for the paintjob, then sighs. "I know," he says quietly. "I just wish he'd tell me what the hell is going on so I can help him."

A few more weeks pass, and Peter still won't speak to him. But Tony swears he can feel the younger man staring whenever they cross paths.

"Sir, there seems to be an altercation occurring on the northern grounds," FRIDAY announces.

Tony sets down his blowtorch and pulls up his goggles. "Give me a visual."

It's Peter, and he seems to be shouting at Rogers.

"Audio," Tony commands.

"How long are you going to keep avoiding Tony?" Steve asks.

Tony rolls his eyes. Really, Rogers? Is this his way of trying to get brownie points or something?

"How is that any of your business?" Peter demands. Tony wants to cheer him on for giving Rogers lip, but he'd sort of like an answer to that particular question, too.

"Tony worked harder than anyone I know to bring you back," Rogers says. "He deserves better."

Peter's fists clench. "Don't talk to me about stuff you don't understand."

Rogers sighs. "Peter, I know exactly what it's like to feel alone and out of place. I-"

"Oh my god, _no_. No, you do not know what I'm going through. No one does. So please don't act like you have any idea. Apparently, the last couple years of my life were just, what, a dream? At least you got to sleep through your fucking time lapse!" He's crying now. Steve tries to place a hand on his shoulder but Peter shrugs it off. "Don't touch me!" he shouts. "I remember everything that happened now! You just left him!"

"Peter, I never meant to-"

" _No_!" Peter snaps. "You left him when he needed you most. I would have never done that to him. I lo-" Peter shuts his mouth tight and storms off.

"Bucky needed me," Steve says so quietly Tony almost doesn't hear it. But Peter does. He turns right back around and marches up to Steve, who stands half a foot taller and twice as broad than him, and punches him square in the jaw.

"So did Tony."

That evening Tony pours himself a drink or three and re-watches the security footage of Peter decking Rogers a few dozen times.

He will admit, at least to himself, that he feels a sick sense of satisfaction knowing the younger man has taken Rogers' betrayal so personally. Tony chooses to take it as a sign; maybe Peter will feel ready to speak to him soon.

God, He hopes so. Tony isn't sure how much more of Peter's silent treatment he can take; all he wants to do is be there for him.

The next morning, Peter is gone.


End file.
